I've been on vacation (if you will) for 2 weeks, I've graduated -- a BA in a Joint Specialization in Anthropology and Sociology at Concordia University and I've survived having my 3 parents around me 24/7. I'm not doing so bad.
Dad is doing well, he's had to shave (#2- not sure what that means in hairstyles- means? the blade the hairdresser used??) his head becasue his hair was falling out in malting preportions, so he did it. I am still not used to seeing him that way however, he wears his baseball cap all the time.
Dad has been getting Neuopgen injections for the last couple of days. He must have these injections after every chemo session. He has 2 sessions under his belt now and one round of Neupogen injections (that finish Friday, tomorrow) - he's looking forward to that. He is also getting radiation on the whole brain now because after the Radiosurgery the whole brain has to be radiated to prevent other tumors from sprouting up. Needless to say dad is fed up of running around. To be honest I would be too. He's had to endure these appointments on his own. I have been letting him do them by himself as I found him depending too much on me to sit with him.. and with Mom and Bo here, I have been trying to stay with them too. These two things (apts) are quick ones and although I feel guilty about letting him do them by himself - he could manage them. Plus I must work. I might be concidered a bad daughter after you all reading this but- I need some peice of mind too.
According to a friend, having a tumor in the Right Frontal Lobe of your brain can cause personality changes... I have been noticing some minor differences in dad over the last coulple of weeks- I hav been chalking it up to me being a pain in the ass daughter- because he doesn't listen to me- kinda thing.. however- the differences are minor and they bug me more than anyone else, least of all dad. I will ask the dr. what it's all about.
The reasons for the Neupogen injections are to boost his white blood cell count, the chemo is killing the good guys off before his body could produce more of them. This cancer business is stupid. This "cancer" all kinds of it- is smart, amazingly smart. It can split cells, and mutate at friggen record speed. I don't like it one bit. If only...
Although I only have 6 followers on this blog (love you guys) I feel the need constantly to write on it. Ramblings, rantings and much more BUT I realize that you all don't need to read my every thought nor would I bore you to death with them. But thank you for joining my blog- I feel important now. psst. Dad doesnt' know I am writing this blog, not sure how he'd feel about it and besides this is the way that i could get things off my chest with out going to a shrink... soon to come though!
Dad has been short tempered (kinda) with me these days and I don't blame him ( i'm a pain in the ass). So after yesterdays 'pointing his finger at me and basically yelling at me', I told myself to back off and let him eat macdonalds (as crappy as it is with no nutrient value!!!), let him drink beer till his heart's content, to not eat at all, and to avoid water- (although his kidneys will get damaged by the chemo)- it's his life and although I love him to bits- it's his kidneys that will need dialasis and it's his life, he may do what he wants with it. Who am I - oh wait! I'm his ONLY child! I don't seem to count. But hey... (i'm rambling again).
I will be supportive and there when i am needed- the shoulder, the rock, the stone to step upon should need be. However, I will try not to loose my sense of self in the process. That should not make me a bad person. especially when it is getting overwhelming.
Today is Canada's Birthday - July 1st. the temperature is nice (sweater is needed) but no rain so far... Time for picture taking. :) Thanks for reading my ramblings, rantings, and other stuff...
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